Dark(n)ess
by TheMortalShadows
Summary: "He would have said that the last thing he remembered was the blood pooling around him as he gagged from a gash in his throat, but when he finally awoke, he couldn't remember a thing. The first thing he saw, though, was a faerie lifting him by his hand from the sticky, crimson mess and smiling at him widely. 'You're awake, sweetheart.'" BL/OC story


**So.**

 **With this story, it was half a dare (EFFFF YOU NIKO-CHAN) to write a story with a yaoi/homoerotic/slash/BL/guyxguy/gay/whatever-you-want-to-call-it and half because I wanted to write about my baby Zander. So, immediately, I went to my RP that I go on and I pulled two of my characters, put them together, and though "Wow, what a freaking pervert I am" and I made a fic on it.**

 **So that's my excuse/reason for this.**

 **Actually, I had (a little bit of) fun writing it. (Actually, it's just a really awkwardly written story). Besides, I got to expand on one of my roleplay's characters. I've never written a guyxguy fic (The closest I've ever gotten is my story Vividly) so please, please, please do not burn me for the horrendousness of the BL display because I don't know how to write romance in general.**

 **So prepare yourselves for hardcore smut.**

 **JK.**

 **Actually, it is raunchier than my other OC stories.**

 **(Not that bad...but like...Yeah)**

 **Lol. All characters are mine. Oh, and Jak and Aiden aren't really my OC's...I just added them because I needed more names.**

 **AND...**

 **Yeah. I know. ZANDER YOU FREAKING FAERIE GUY THING-...I mean, I didn't really picture him like this, but I put him in as best as he could because I wanted to expand on his character. Besides, who knows? He could swing for both teams.**

 **Oh, and also I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT THE HUNT IS LIKE SO NO FLAMES FOR THAT PLEASE. I'M JUST MAKING MY OWN DEPICTION OF IT. OH, AND ALSO, THOUGH ONLY MALES CAN JOIN THE WILD HUNT, I'VE CHANGED THAT FOR THE SHEER BALANCE OF STUFF. AND BECAUSE ONLY GUYS IN THE HUNT WOULD NOT BE AS FUN IN MY RP.**

 **So,**

 **Enjoy**

 **(or at least try to)**

 **~~" _What makes night within us may leave stars."_ ~~**

 _Holy crap_.

He was sure he was straight.

His mind was screaming at him that he was such a freak.

Was this normal?

Not for people who were straight.

And he knew, for a fact, that he was straight.

Straight.

Straight.

 _Straight._

 _..._

So that's what it felt like to kiss a guy...

The other faerie had drawn away before he could react and Zander felt like screaming. What the hell was going on? It was only when the faerie had stood up and walked away with his cloak billowing behind him that Zander laid back against the wolf behind him, giving a sigh. The wolf, still wary of his presence, growled lightly. It wasn't great with newcomers though he was determined to tame it. What he couldn't tame, though, were the thoughts racing through his head.

Why the hell had the other faerie-

He blushed at the thought again and pulled his hood over his head as if there was someone outside the stalls watching him. He wouldn't be surprised if there was. It still smelled of wild peppermint from the other faerie having been in the stalls and it distracted him. But he just pushed his hair behind his ears, which were pointed slightly under his fingertips, and moved his cloak over him to keep himself warm.

And that night he dreamed about peppermint.

 ** _~~"One need not be a chamber to be haunted." ~~_**

 **A Few Months Before**

The day he had 'died' was also the day he started living.

He would have said that the last thing he remembered was the blood pooling around him as he gagged from a gash in his throat, but when he finally awoke, he couldn't remember a thing. The first thing he saw, though, was a faerie lifting him by his hand from the sticky, crimson mess and smiling at him widely.

"You're awake, sweetheart."

The voice was strange...unfamiliar...In fact, Zander couldn't remember anything and everything seemed out of place. But he still remembered his name. So he repeated _Zander, Zander, Zander, Zander_ over and over in his head until he stumbled and said it out loud.

"Huh?" The strange faerie who had pulled him up from the blood pool tilted his head. "That your name? Zander?"

Zander nodded, too tired to not trust the faerie. His neck hurt. It felt like it was on fire.

"Well, Zander," The faerie started, "You almost died. You kinda did, but I saved you from the eternal kind. I'm part of the Hunt, see. The Wild Hunt, and I want to take you in. I've been watching you. We've met before. You just won't remember it now that you kinda...died."

"I didn't die." Zander managed to say, leaning against the wall for balance.

"Fine. Think what you want. You already ate the food of the Hunt before you died. So you're really one of us."

"I..I am?" He said stupidly.

"That's right, sweetheart."

"How...How can you tell?"

"Your eyes." He said, staring down at him. "One is purple. One is orange. Heterochromia is the trademark of the Hunt."

It was only then that Zander noticed the state of the other faerie's eyes as well. One was a bright green; a grassy peacock green almost. And the other was a pitch black, looking like a dark, hole in his face. It was...unnerving. He swallowed audibly and decided to look at the faerie's hair instead, which was also an inky black, a severe contrast to his pale skin. If the saying 'the eyes are the windows to the soul' was true, Zander would have only seen darkness.

"So..." He said, coughing up a small clot of blood before wiping it away. "What do I call you?"

The faerie smirked. "You can call me Aspen."

 ** _~~"Darkness approaches from outside."~~_**

"Can't sleep?"

"What?" Zander looked back to see someone in the darkness. He couldn't tell who it was but the voice sounded familiar.

"You should get some rest."

Zander shrugged at the person. "Maybe later."

 **~~" _In the dark I rest, unready for the light which dawns."_ ~~**

"You're a good shot."

Zander jumped, sending the arrow off into the breeze. "You startled me." He said, looking down at the huge wolf that was laying obediently by a tree nearby. Zander combed his hair back with his fingers, pulling his hood on to hide his sheepishness. Glancing back, he saw Aspen perched on a lower branch that had been previously empty ten minutes prior and her wondered how long he had been watching him.

"Where did you learn?"

"...No idea." He said honestly.

"I could give you some tips, though." Aspen noted, hopping down from his spot on the branch and going over to Zander. His face was in shadow, his hood still on. "I'm going to take you and the other twig-"

"Jak."

"What was that?"

"His name is Jak, I think."

"Oh. Okay. Well, I'm going to take you and Jak out on a Hunt tomorrow to see if we can recruit any more faeries." Aspen explained, trailing a finger down the bowstring of Zander's bow. "Did you get a new bow?"

"I...I made it."

"It's gorgeous." He stated, though he was frowning. "I didn't know you were good at making them."

"People are full of surprises."

Aspen smirked. "That's certainly true for you."

 ** _~~"Darkness does not leave us easily as we would hope." ~~_**

Silence.

He had expected it to be quiet but the deafening push of nothing pressing against his ears was startling. Softly, the wind began to stir his hair so he tucked it under his hood before it could get in his face. The night had blanketed the Downworlder Towns in a heavy shadow and the few remaining werewolves and vampires and warlocks shuffled around. But Zander hardly cared about them. It was the faeries- the angelic demons- that he was after. But they, decidedly, were difficult. Then again, it was only his third Hunt and Aspen was forgiving.

"Just be nice. Be inviting. Be mysterious," Aspen had said the first day he had taken Jak and Zander out. His tone was dark. It was always dark. And thick like sap that enthralled him and made him tip his head to the side in a confused and eager spell to hear more.

Zander shook his head. Aspen unnerved him. Jak annoyed him. Aiden was a wimp. It seemed like the only decent character at the Hunt was his wolf. And the wolf, technically, wasn't even his. Oh, well. He had never been great with people anyway and preferred to keep to himself.

Sliding down from his post, he listened.

Just listened.

With his eyes closed, he could hear faint noises of talking, the constant yet faint swish of fabric in the wind that he was sure was his own cloak, a murmur of taverns around the corner and a rustle of twigs from where a bird nested in a nearby tree.

And then there was a scream.

With widened eyes, he rushed silently through the winding alleys till he came across a werewolf and a faerie, writhing in battle as they clawed and snapped at each other in angry fervor. The wolf, having the ability to heal quickly, quickly sprang to his feet, pulling out a switchblade only to be pulled back down by the hysterical faerie, who was bleeding over the slick cobblestones. Zander wanted to stop them or, at least, run.

But he stayed there and watched.

And when the wolf finally retreated, Zander stepped into the light of a streetlamp and helped the faerie to her feet.

"Are you alright?" He asked. It was dark, but he could see her nod. "You're a good fighter."

"...Thanks." The faerie said, still gripping her dagger furiously. "I..I need to-"

"Why don't you come with me?"

She opened her eyes wide in surprise. "What?" Her eyes searching his face, she gasped. "You're..A Hunt faerie."

"And I can offer you freedom within our clan. Join us?"

The faerie was hesitant but she agreed at last and Zander was delighted. Finally, _finally,_ he had been able to make some progress.

 **~ _~"To fight evil, you have to understand the dark."_ ~~**

The screams of the fights he heard in the Downworlder Towns were starting to make their way into his dreams.

Except when he woke up and the screams continued.

Stumbling tiredly from the stalls, where he had been sleeping, Zander went in the direction of the commotion to be greeted with two faeries tussling on the ground. They were at each other's throats, daggers drawn as they stabbed and bit at empty air where the other had been a second before. The ground around them was darkened with drops of blood and as soon as the dagger from the smaller faerie flashed, the crowd around them hissed in surprise.

With a screech, the taller faerie recoiled, a long cut from his back and up half his wing. He kicked out and tripped the faerie on the ground, a sickening crunch ringing through the air as the shorter faerie landed awkwardly. With a smirk, the taller one looked out into the spectators, his wing bleeding and his jet black eye glinting.

Aspen.

So much for setting an example.

Scowling partly in worry and partly in annoyance, Zander pulled away from the crowd as the fight broke off, going back to the stables. Hearing someone behind him, he hurried his pace and slipped into the stalls, shutting the door quickly.

"Wait." A voice said, pushing through the door. "Hey, sweetheart."

"Don't call me that." Zander scowled, turning around and seeing Aspen, stumbling into the stall. "Why did you get into the fight?"

"He was pissing me off." Aspen said, twisting to look around at his torn wing. "Ah. It'll heal."

"People are scared of you."

He looked over at Zander, smirking. "Are you?"

Zander thought for a moment, suddenly biting his lip and looking wearily at him. He wasn't one to judge out loud and rather didn't want to answer. Besides, Aspen made him... Uncomfortable. They weren't alike at all: Aspen was rather foul natured- and foul mouthed- and flamboyant while Zander thought of himself as...Normal. A littler reserved, even.

"Zander." Aspen said, going towards him. He put his fingers under his chin, lifting his face. "You're being-"

"Don't touch me." Zander pushed his hand away, jerking back. "That's just...creepy."

Aspen grinned darkly, his eyes shadows. "I like creepy."

 _ **~~"There's a kind of real darkness...where even the light gone astray."~~**_

"Ow... Ow..." Zander whimpered, pulling his arrow back, his string cutting into his fingers. "Can we take a break?"

"No." Aspen growled close to his ear, breathing hot air down the back of his neck. "Now pull it back again and shoot. Your form is getting worse." He said, pressing a hand against Zander's shoulder. Stepping back, he pulled on a wild sprig of peppermint, chewing on a leaf. He always seemed to smell of peppermint.

"I can't do it anymore." Zander said, dropping his bow and wiping the blood off his fingertips on his cloak with a hiss. He would have also pointed out that it was night.

But with Aspen, it was always dark.

 _ **~~"Real things in the darkness seem no realer than dreams."~~**_

Having awoken to sounds of muffled, pained gasping, Zander sat up, looking around. He had fallen asleep against a tree near the edge of base and had a painful cramp in his shoulder. Looking to where the soft gasps were coming from, he saw Aspen sitting on an edge of a large rock, a bloody dagger in his hand. Digging it into his arm, the blood welled up and rolled off his skin, dripping onto the rock.

Again, he repeated the cut, deeper this time, and bit his sleeve to stop himself from crying out. Zander watched in confusion. Why would someone do that to themself? And then Zander saw him dig in the skin before reaching in with his fingers and pull out a fang. _He must have gotten bitten_ , he speculated, wincing at the thought.

"Are you okay?" Zander called out into the darkness, at Aspen.

He recoiled from his voice, pocketing the dagger and darting off. "I'm fine..."

Zander thought he imagined it, but when he woke up, there blood was still there.

 _ **~~"Fly without wings; Dream with open eyes; See in darkness."~~**_

"I guess I'm just not good with... People." Zander said, hanging his legs over the cliffside.

"I have a good bloodline." Aspen said. "I'm a pure faerie. It's clear you're not one though." He said, looking over at Zander. "You don't have wings."

Zander nodded and instantly looked at the black lacy ones that arose from Aspen's back. Looking up slightly, he noticed that there were silver flecks under his eyes and on his neck and hands. He guessed that he hadn't ever seen them before, seeing as Aspen often wore cloaks and gloves to hide his skin. Embarrassed to be staring, he lowered his eyes and stared at the ground, flicking a rock. "What about you? I mean...Don't you have any parents?"

Aspen smirked. "I have no clue if they're still alive. But I know my bloodlines. I'm related to Leliel. Angel of the night. And distantly related to Asmodeus, demon of-"

"Lust." Zander finished. "It's fitting."

"Really?"

"Well..." He trailed off his sentence. "I guess..."

Aspen stood up, ruffling Zander's hair with his hand. "Sweetheart. You don't know the half of it." He said smugly, drawing a finger down his cheek before raising his chin. This time, Zander didn't pull away. "Come on, sweet. Let's go back to base."

Standing up shakily, Zander grabbed his bow, only reaching Aspen's nose. He felt slightly short. "Why?"

"It's getting late."

"I want to go see the wolf anyway."

"It's like you're in love with that thing."

"He's nice."

"He's a freaking dog."

"Still... " He protested, walking towards the stalls. Pausing when Aspen followed him, he looked back. "Why are you following me?" He asked, fixing his quiver.

"I want to walk you back."

"Okay..." He said uncertainly, slipping into the stalls. Seeing the wolf, he knelt down beside it, petting it.

"He likes you." Aspen said, sitting down. He slid his hand on Zander's knee, leaning to see the wolf. "I've never liked wolves." He said, looking at Zander with a smirk. "It is late, though." Murmured Aspen, pulling his hand away. "You have an eyelash under your eye." He said, brushing it away with his thumb.

Zander looked over at him and stammered, "...I... I...Goodnight, Aspen..."

"You should train tomorrow." He said, his hood slipping off his head as he blinked his eyes. His hair fell over them and Zander had a hard time reading Aspen's expression. "With me."

He swallowed. "I...Maybe when-"

He was cut off when Aspen leaned forward and suddenly pulled him close, his hand sliding behind Zander's head and into his hair. And suddenly everything tasted like peppermint and the only thing he could see were shadows and darkness. Only when Aspen did pull away did Zander gasp for air and register what had happened that he realized he didn't push him back.

But when he went to say something, Aspen was already gone.

 ** _~~"I am terrified by this dark thing that sleeps in me."~~_**

"I already Hunted today."

"You should go again."

"Go bother Jak. Or Aiden."

"But you," Aspen smirked. "Are my favourite."

"I told you.. I'm... I'm... I'm not... I mean... I'm straight." Zander said, flushing darkly. "I don't swing that way." He said, but he wasn't really sure. In fact, he wasn't even sure if he had interests in anyone. "I'm not really interested in any type of..."

"Relationship?" Aspen smirked. "You'll come around. But really. Faeries don't fall in love."

"I don't doubt it. Besides...you're too... Fast." Zander muttered, avoiding looking at Aspen and his eyes. Though one was a peacock green and the other was a shadowed black, they both seemed dark.

And he tried his hardest to stop himself from getting lost.

 ** _~~"Darkness dwells within even the best of us."~~_**

Aiden, Zander finally established, was a complete wuss.

Not only had he quivered once Aspen snapped at him, but he sobbed into Zander's shoulder when he had broken his ankle and was being threatened to be listed as a cripple and kicked out. Frankly, it was embarrassing. And by the end of the day, Zander's shoulder was spotted with Aiden's tears and he was left there awkwardly patting Aiden's back as he slept as if he were a dog. It would have been easier if he was.

Finally when Aiden had fallen asleep, he went back to go with his wolf. Laying down on the floor of the stall, he rolled onto his side, pressing his face into the wolf's side. Murmuring comforting words when the wolf sat up, Zander coaxed it slowly to lay back down beside him, lulling the beast to sleep. It was only a few minutes later that he had noticed another person beside him, playing with the hair that had grown to the back of his hood, which was longer than he liked.

"You awake, sweetheart?"

"Don't call me that." Zander groaned, looking up to see Aspen sitting beside him. "What do you want?"

"That's a dangerous question. There are lots of things I want."

"I can't give you anything."

"There are a few things you can give me." Aspen smirked.

"Gross. Go away." Zander sat up tiredly, looking at Aspen. "You're... Unnerving." He mumbled, looking away.

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" Aspen said, reaching forward to pet the wolf. When it lifted his head and growled and snapped at him, he pushed it back immediately and hissed. Zander caught his arm before he could prod the wolf again just to annoy it.

"Don't do that." He snapped, glaring at Aspen halfheartedly. "You're making him angry."

"Then come here." Aspen said, pulling him against his chest and curling his fingers through his hair. Zander tensed awkwardly, listening to the soft thumping of his heart. He was cold. They both were and everything seemed so empty, like a big hole that he could feel but not entirely perceive. The very feeling of nothingness startled him and he drew back slightly. "You feel it too?"

"What?" Zander asked, looking up slightly; hesitantly.

"It's the curse of the faerie. Everything is empty. You never truly feel anything clearly and pain is the only thing that stands out from the rest."

"Is that why you fight?"

"I fight because it hurts. And it reminds me that there is no such thing as trust and that everyone will turn against each other in a second. And I fight because it is fun. I live for control. Power. Excitement. Sheer excitement."

The look in his eyes unsettled Zander and he decided to focus on the floor instead.

"Excitement?"

Raking his fingers through Zander's hair, Aspen smirked. "Yeah. Excitement. I look for exciting things. Things like you."

"I'm not exciting."

"Well, you don't like me."

"Who said that?"

"Well, you don't _want_ me. And that makes it an exciting game."

"I told you. I'm not interested." Zander muttered, quite tired of the other faerie's constant nagging. "Not all faeries are bi."

"Are you?"

At this, Zander was silent.

 _ **~~"Everyone is pretty enough in the dark."~~**_

"I saw you staring at me."

"I was not."

Aspen smirked. "You so were."

 _ **~~"Tied to the darkness... soon to be completely eclipsed."~~**_

Zander hissed in a mix of annoyance and pure instinct as his hair was pulled, tightened between Aspen's fingers. Good God, all he smelled was peppermint. It _tasted_ like it. But it was almost comforting. His train of thoughts were immediately broken when fingernails dug into his hip and his shoulder pressed forward into a collarbone and his mouth collided with...something. He couldn't tell what was what and where he was but everything was dark and it smelled like peppermint. He wasn't sure he quite enjoyed kissing another faerie or kissing _anyone_ at all but he wasn't about to pull away.

Even so, it felt wrong.

Almost dirty.

He had only known Aspen for a few months; six at most.

But he still didn't pull away.

There was a faint, delighted purring sound that resonated from Aspen and Zander pressed his hands against his chest, pressing his palms against small scars through his thin shirt. It was all cold and in the night, he couldn't see a thing. Feeling the bark of a tree against his back, he threw his head back to gasp for air. He slipped his hands over Aspen's shoulders, his fingertips brushing against the base of his silvery black wings, feeling the silky, almost plastic-y texture of them. Jerking back, Aspen flashed him a surprised look.

"What was that?" He exclaimed.

"I just...touched your wings? It was an accident?" Zander mumbled quizzically. "Sorry?"

"No...It's just weird. Wings. I can't explain. But they're like...personal, almost. Lots of nerve endings."

"Sorry I accidentally molested you?"

"Feel free to do it on purpose next time."

"Pervert."

"Thanks."

Zander swallowed. "So it must have hurt when you got cut."

"Like hell."

"Oh." Zander stood there for a minute, staring into the darkness though he could make out the features of eyes, hair, a clavicle, a shoulder, and hands in the dark. His back was still up against the trunk of the tree and he was sure he had a splinter in the back of his neck. Shifting uncomfortably, he glanced past him. "Sorry...I've kind of...Killed the mood, haven't I?" He said hesitantly, though there wasn't really any mood to begin with anyway.

"We can get back to it if you want." Aspen offered blandly.

Zander flushed. "I'm...not really in the mood."

"You're a guy." He pointed out. "You're always in the mood."

And they were kissing again but this time, all traces of peppermint were gone.

And all that was left was darkness.

 ** _~~"Your darkness is a symphony."~~_**

The difference between desire and love was indistinguishable for Zander.

He guessed he liked him, because he was a new concept to him. Even so, he didn't love Aspen. He didn't even trust him. That was obvious.

But it was like basic human instinct and desire was something that came to him naturally.

 ** _~~"There's a dark side to beauty."~~_**

Clutching the fur in his hand, Zander leaned down against the wolf's back, hearing the heavy breathing as the wolf ran down the slopes of the hills. Its shoulder blades moved under his skin and fur and muscle tensed when Zander pet down its neck but kept running. It was sleek and dark, its eyes glowing like pinpricks of lava or like they were burning coals. It howled and barked once when Zander coaxed it to slow to a stop and it trotted to shade where it flopped down and panted.

Laying against the wolf, Zander was content.

He didn't know why he hadn't ever been but he guessed that he was just stupid. And naive. And young. Twirling a flower in his fingertips, he tossed it away before going on to restring his bow, pulling to snap the string back on. His bow needed replacing, he knew, as he had used it far more than most in the past couple months...or year...He had begun to lose track of time. Jak had said how time ran differently in the Hunt and the Faerie world in general but the confusion to him was completely and utterly fascinating and confusing. Seasons sometimes seemed to change in a day but some days seemed to drag on for weeks. It was entirely, and always changing.

The wolf barked and Zander ran his hand over it's head to comfort it but, when he opened his eyes, he saw Aspen walking towards him, looking tired.

"Do you just follow me everywhere?" Zander asked, pushing himself up to a sitting position. "Did you get into another fight?"

Aspen touched a cut on his cheek and scowled, slumping down beside him. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay..." Zander sat silently, looking out into the woods. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Are you concerned?"

"You didn't answer my question."

"I know."

"You're bleeding."

"Zander-..."

Zander raised his head. It was one of the few times Aspen called him by his name. "What is it?"

"I just...I mean...I...Nothing."

"You're...different today."

"I know." Aspen said quietly, grabbing the clasp of his cloak and pulling him to him roughly. He kissed him once before burying his head into his neck, leaning against him. Zander blinked, entirely confused, but sat there as Aspen breathed hot air against his neck. Sitting there for the longest time, he felt Aspen clutch his cloak, not pulling away. He heard small gasping sounds and he assumed that Aspen had been hurt worse from his most recent fight than he thought and was having trouble breathing, but when he listened closer, he realized he was crying.

"What-...? Are you sure you're okay?" Zander inquired, not moving.

Aspen curled his arms around his neck, his hair falling over his face, which was wet with hot tears. "Don't look at me."

"I can't anyway. It's too dark." He sighed. "I wish you'd just tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing's wrong. I'm fine. So can you just stop harping on my case?" Aspen snapped suddenly. His tone was harsh and he dug his nails into the fabric of the cloak, creating small permanent marks. "I already told you that I don't want to talk about it so just shut up."

"If you're going to be like this and always on _my_ case, then I expected you'd be a little more open."

"It's not like I made you my bitch so I don't have to tell you anything." He said furiously. "You don't mean anything to me."

Zander swallowed. "You don't mean that."

"Just shut up." He muttered, reaching to curl his fingers in the hair on the back of his neck, looking blankly at him as he pulled him closer. This time, however, Zander pulled away, pulling Aspen's hands off him and holding his wrists.

"What the hell is wrong with you right now? First you're all distant. Then you're all on me. And then you're crying. After you're angry as hell and now you're all back on me again." Zander said, quizzical. He wanted to understand what was wrong, but he couldn't grasp a single reason for it. For anything, actually. So he just watched Aspen as he stood up and looked away. "If you're not going to tell me anything, like usual," Zander said bitterly, almost feeling disappointed and impatient, "then you can go. Because I don't know what is wrong with you."

"Everything."

Zander paused. "What?"

" _Everything_ is the fucking matter." Aspen said, stalking away. "I'll visit you tomorrow. But leave me alone until then."

Zander toyed with the idea of calling after him that he wasn't going to visit him anyway.

But he couldn't.

After all, it hurt to lie.

 ** _~~"Darkness there, and nothing more."~~_**

He hadn't been able to get a complete answer from Aspen, much to his dismay.

Then again, he never gave answers if he wasn't inclined to answer them.

But there was something about him that kept drawing him back. Perhaps it was the sheer unavailability of his feelings or the dangerous rush of adrenaline he got around him, for reasons he couldn't place his finger on. He guessed, though, that it was like a cigarette. The more he smoked it, the more it became a part of you until it was difficult to let it go. And it became...a friend. There was some satisfaction from sin. And he couldn't escape.

He didn't want to anyway.

 ** _~~"The darkness is a gift."~~_**

"What about us?"

It was the first time Zander had referred to them as 'us' and it came out almost...naturally. Aspen, however, looked expressionless, dark almost. It had almost recently occurred to Zander that, ever since he joined the Hunt, everything seemed dark. The sun never seemed to rise though sunrise came and the world got dark again before it was night. But to him, it was night everyday. So he squinted as hard as he could but it was hard to tell the good from the bad and all the details in between. It was frighteningly intoxicating.

Aspen turned to him, the black of his left eye staring straight at him and Zander wondered if it was black for a reason. He had noticed that most changed eyes of the Wild Hunt were black. That black was the absence of light and was the symbol of death and everything evil.

He wondered if his eye wasn't black because he wasn't a pure faerie.

"What do you mean 'what about us'?" Aspen asked, ripping Zander from his trail of thoughts.

"I mean," he said hesitantly, flushing, "that...aren't we...something?"

Again, it was silent. And it was crazy how loud little sounds got when they sat there. Just, still.

The rustle of the trees.

Wind.

Distant water.

A heartbeat.

Zander was sure it was his own pounding in his chest, worried he had said something wrong. Still, Aspen had been the one to make the first move and it gave him a little bit of courage knowing that they were...close. He didn't know if they were, really though. They knew each other on a superficial level but when it came to actually _knowing_ each other, Zander felt clueless. He wanted to know if Aspen felt the same way. About everything.

"Let's go on a Hunt." Aspen said at last, slipping his hand around Zander's arm and pulling him to his feet. "It's dark anyway."

"Why is it always so dark?" Zander suddenly blurted out. He missed the light terribly.

Aspen gave him a curious look but answered.

"The devil has no power in the light."

 ** _~~"We are all like the bright moon, we still have our darker side."~~_**

Aspen had grown more distant, he could tell.

More smug, even. If just to cover up what he was feeling.

Zander, though confused, followed him anyway and was happy.

Kind of.

 _ **~~"Darkness is just another name for night."~~**_

It was cold.

Snow had begun to fall on the dark earth and the cold wind had chilled everything. Taking warmth from Aspen, Zander leaned forward, resting his chin on his shoulder. There was a certain light in the distance, he noted with a smile, and he was comfortable when he felt hands press against his chest, pushing him away and creating a cold distance between them. He blinked, staring at Aspen, who gave him a distant look, unimpressed. "What-...Aspen. What is it?" Zander asked in confusion, not knowing why he was pushed away.

"Don't lean on me." Aspen said, sounding like he was a thousand miles away. "I'm tired."

"Are you okay?"

He scowled, his blacked eye glinting. "I'm fine."

"Are you hiding something?" Zander asked.

Silence.

"You know you can't lie." Zander reached to touch Aspen's shoulder but his hand was swatted away instantly. "Aspen-"

"Please, please, just go." He pleaded angrily. "Just go."

"What the hell?" Bewildered, Zander stared at him. His face was guarded, he could see, and his green eye was raging with mixed emotions. "Are you okay? You know..You can talk to me...Like we have in the past."

"No."

"Aspen-"

"Go away."

"But-"

"I'm seeing someone else."

Zander blinked, surprised at first and at the shockingly casual tone of his voice. "But...But... _us_..."

"So?"

"Don't you care about us? I thought you were happy...I...I thought that we had something. A _thing_ , you know. A relationship."

Aspen shot him a scowl and his voice raised slightly. "No. We don't. So go away."

"Aspen-"

"I thought you at least liked me."

"Faeries don't fall in love."

"But Aspen! Why are you-"

"I'm not in love with you, stupid." He cried out angrily and Zander flinched at his tone. "Just leave me alone. I'm sick of you."

Zander widened his eyes, looking hurt. "No...I thought...but...I don't believe it-"

"Don't you get it?" Aspen snapped furiously. "I fucking _played_ you."

Taking in a sharp breath of air, Zander took a step back. "You what?"

"I played you, dumbass. You think someone like me would actually like someone like you?" He asked and there was malice. True malice in his tone. "Hah. I could have anyone I wanted here and you think I would fall in love? Especially with some prick like you? Whatever. You were fun while it lasted but I'm not into the romance and fluffy kind of shit." He said, his tone brutally honest.

"You...You..." Zander wasn't entirely disappointed. Not really. But angry. "Just because you think so 'high and mighty' of yourself, it doesn't mean you can toy with everyone you want."

"Really?" He said, his mouth curling into a grimace of a smile. "Who's the pure one here? My bloodline automatically puts me above your _impurity_. But if you think you're so high and mighty too," he held out his arms and grinned, "show me your wings, _little prince_."

Zander's face twisted in pain and rage and he flung himself at Aspen, knocking him to the ground and blinking away angry tears. Aspen clawed at his face, the silvery flecks on his skin reflecting light as they tussled on the floor, hissing and scratching. He wasn't sure who pulled the first knife but suddenly, they were just faeries in a ring and Zander saw what Aspen meant by how everyone would turn against each other in a second.

"You lied." Zander said angrily, slashing out with his dagger blindly. Aspen screeched and there was blood. In a pit of rage, Zander seethed in hatred and self loathing. He was so...stupid. Gullible. Naive.

It had only registered that he had been pushed to the ground when a rock dug into his chest and Aspen yanked his hair to lift his head, exposing his throat. "Someone's touchy." He said smugly, holding a knife to his throat. "I can't say I didn't enjoy our escapade, though." Blood dripped down Aspen's arm from where the dagger had stricken him and onto the ground beside Zander's head. "But maybe you should know who you're dealing with before you fall in love."

"I'm not in _love_ with you." Zander spat. "I just thought higher of you than to do this."

"Sorry to rain on your parade, sweetheart."

And he stood up and walked away, leaving Zander in the dark.

 _ **~~"Darkness is manifested on earth and will always undermine and degrade the light."~~**_

Zander sat in the stalls.

The wolf laid by his side.

And he waited.

He wasn't sure for what, but he knew something was coming. _Sunset,_ he thought. But there was no sun that he could see.

But he just sat there.

Waiting.

 ** _~~"Be nothing but light in the dark."~~_**

It hadn't taken him long to get over it.

He hadn't ever loved Aspen. Lusted, maybe. But not loved.

He counted the number of days to the point in time where he didn't think about Aspen anymore and it only measured to a day past skin deep. It hadn't been a real relationship. Not really. Sometimes, when his dreams weren't filled with peppermint and darkness, he dreamed of what his life might have been like before he died. And he felt a little...lighter. And so he walked away from the sin of darkness- he liked to call it his metaphorical cigarette and he vaguely remembered a book that had that same metaphor, but used differently- and he retreated back to his stalls. It was safe there.

But there was something tainted about his thoughts.

Like something was missing.

And though he yearned for the light, he wanted darkness again. Because darkness was dangerous and it made him feel truly...alive.

Trying to satisfy his insatiable want for the sin, he drew away and tried to be content with his wolf. And he was. He didn't _need_ anyone. He didn't _want_ anyone. And people were untrustworthy anyway. Aspen had taught him that.

Was it possible for someone to change that much?

He continued to go about his regular routine of Hunting and spending time with his wolf but something was different. Jak was quiet. Aiden avoided him. And the only person who talked to him was some pneumatic excuse for a girl who was all light and blinding.

She wasn't terrible, he supposed.

But it was unnerving and he didn't want to change.

There were times when he snapped at people he went on Hunts with and he couldn't help but feel this infectious darkness growing within him. This ball of ice that chilled him to the bone that settled within him and it felt like darkness. And he remembered the feel of being pulled out of the puddle of blood when he was rescued. He remembered his first Hunt and seeing the look of satisfaction on Aspen's face when he got someone to join him. He remembered cuts on his fingers from a bow pulled too many times and the taste and smell of peppermint that lingered on all of his clothes.

And he remembered how _good_ it felt to be in the dark. To not know what was out there and everything seemed a mystery. In the light, he saw a path. In the dark, he found himself making one of his own. But his attraction to such darkness scared him. So he kept waiting. Waiting for the light to come and the moment when he would find himself glad to see it.

And when he finally did see the sunrise coming, Zander watching the sun peek up over the hills.

But something inside him had changed and it was ugly.

And so he denied himself of seeing the light and turned away to go back to the stalls.

Into the dark.

Retreating back to sin with open arms.

 ** _~~"Where light exists, darkness awaits."~~_**

 ** _fin._**

 **Author's Note:**

 **I'm going to say this again, because I know people missed it, that I know girls can't join the Hunt, but in my RP, we changed that. Kay? So accept it. Jk. But really.**

 **Also, for another look into the world of Zander and the wolf and the Hunt, go check Faded Sunsets, which is by far better than this story. Since she did hers first, I gave a little ode to sunrise and sunset and all that 'light and dark' sort of stuff as well. You guys probably won't understand much of this story, seeing as it was based on my RP but I hope it wasn't too weird and you liked it nonetheless.**

 **Also...Look below for credits given for the quotes and all the lovely things authors and poets said about darkness. I tried to put them in order but I apologize if I made a mistake.**

 **Darkness quotes by (in order): Victor Hugo, Emily Dickinson, Christopher Pike, Denise Levertov, Margaret Stohl, Nalini Singh, Toba Beta, Murasaki Shikibu, Dejan Stojanovic, Sylvia Plath, Dean Koontz, Sylvain Reynard, Shiro Amano, Christopher Poindexter, Margaret Atwood, Edgar Allan Poe, Nikki Rowe, Munia Khan, Kahlil Gibran, Dexsta Ray, Pablo Neruda and the last quote is mine. :)**


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